Always There

Five months ago, today, the Lord called
our Precious Austin Home to Heaven.
We think of him daily.  His absence is felt.
He is missed in the little things of life,
and in the not so little things.  Painfully so.

There are tears.  Every. Single. Day.

The reality of life without our Austin
is sinking in.  It's always there.  Always with us.
We will carry it with us until the day we die.
It's part of who we are.  Who we've become.

We feel it.  Keenly.  And, it hurts.
So very, very much!

 ~ Austin in Fall 2009 ~

However, Austin is not hurting.  He is not sad.
He does not cry.  He is happy and complete.
He is praising the Lord without hindrance.
He does not have to battle the world,
the flesh and the evil one any longer.

He has been freed from his body of death.

One day, that body will rise in perfection.
It will be reunited with his soul.
One day, that will be true for us, as well.
What a precious future we have if we are the Lord's!

Our hearts are fixed more and more on Heaven.
Less and less on this world.
And, our Precious Saviour is with us in this journey.
He is Faithful.  He is Good.  He does all things well.
His Word is a comfort to our hearts.
His Truth is what keeps us from despair.

So, we walk this day with Him.
Each step.  Moment by moment.  Looking to Him.
It's the only way forward.  There is no other option.
It's a battle to keep our eyes focused.
A battle to keep our hearts set on what's True.
It's what we must do.

By His grace.  In His strength.  For His glory.
May we always be found giving Him praise.
He alone is worthy.

Many Blessings,
Camille

What About Socialization?

What about socialization?

All those who have been home educating their children
for any length of time, know that this is 
THE all-time most popular, always-asked question.

I cannot tell you how many times it's been posed to us.

Many.  Over and over.  Again.
And Again!  :)

~ Emma (centre) with two friends at 
our weekly skating outing ~

Rather than re-invent the wheel,

I am going to share with you a well-rounded,

thorough, and well-thought-through answer via a link.

My friend Heather, who blogs at Cultivated Lives, nailed it.  

Find her wonderful post by clicking here.

I am sure you will be encouraged by her words.
Just as I have been.

~ Fraser and Emma playing Skip-Bo ~

Thank you, Heather, for writing such a
well rounded, well thought through article on this
topic that we all must wrestle with.
Not just those of us who home educate.
All of us.

Many Blessings,
Camille

Time Stands Still

Our Austin is outside of time.

For now, we live within it.

That means that Calvin, Fraser and Emma

will catch up to their big brother in age.

If the Lord allows, they will pass him.

In this way ~ Time stands still.

It's a strange thing, really.
I never thought I would live longer than any of our children.
I thought they would all outlive me.
However, that was not to be.

Our desire for each of our children is that they
would love and serve and follow the Lord all their days.
And that they would go to live with Him in Heaven for all eternity.
I never expected that any would be called Home first.

But, one has.
Our Austin has gone before us.

~ Calvin, Fraser, Austin, and Emma in 2004 ~

Our destiny is the same.
Not for anything good in us.
But, because of the goodness of our Saviour.
He is perfect.  He lived perfectly.
He died to pay the penalty for the sins of His people.
That each one might be made acceptable with God.
So that one day we might go live with Him for all eternity.

What an incredible thought!

May the peace that comes from these truths be yours.
May you know without any doubt where you will spend eternity.
If you are not sure where that will be,
Please seek the Lord while He may be found.

"...behold, now is the day of salvation." 
~ I Corinthians 6:2b ~

"...Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ,
and thou shalt be saved..." 
~ Acts 16:31 ~

"All that the Father giveth me shall come to me;
and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out."
~ John 6:37 ~

Many Blessings,
Camille

Seeking to See

It's a good thing to notice the seemingly little and insignificant

things in day to day life and living.

The little things really can be the most precious of all.
It is too easy to take so many things for granted.  So often.

When we overlook the little, we miss out on so much.  Too much.

Much of life is little.  Insignificant.  Routine.

But, these things are not little at all ~ they're big.

All added up and rolled into life ~ these moments are significant.
Very significant.  Very precious.  Anything but routine.

We often don't realise this until we look back.

On this day, I am starting up again.  Beginning afresh.

Seeking to see the tracings of His Hand in the everyday things of life.

They are there and they are precious.
 If only we will stop to consider.

If only we will slow down to take it all in.

These moments?  They are all precious gifts from His Hand.
By God's Great Grace, I am seeking to slow down to see.
These are the moments to cherish.

I am thankful for the ability to teach my girl to sew.
She is learning on the very same machine I learned on.
Isn't that something?  I *love* it.  :)

I am also thankful that she wants to learn!

Thankful, too, that our little project (a joint effort) turned out.
It was a skirt for Emily ~ Emma's doll.  :)
See the little purse?  It was a gift from a precious little friend.
Thank you Miss R...it's perfect!

I am thankful for my young men who work diligently at their studies.

And, I'm thankful for moments like these (above) when we catch
our Fraser doing what he loves best ~ studying about other lands and cultures.

This young man is able to work in the office
while Howie works in the background ~ it's a gift.

We are finally able to tackle the boys' room and fill 
all.those.holes. ~ Can you tell I'm excited about it? 

Yes, Calvin and Fraser both contributed to the state of the walls.
I was sad that I neglected to get a before photo for memories' sake.
They had posters of airplanes and countries and hockey plastered everywhere.
It was a sight to behold.  Maybe it's a good thing I forgot to take a picture.

Yes, a very good thing.  Smile.

I am thankful for this little rose tree and that we were able to plant it in this spot.
It was a gift in memory of our Austin.  Gorgeous blooms were produced all summer long.
Every day, as I come and go from our home, I pass by it.

Our precious Austin's entire memorial service has been 
preserved for us on DVD ~ thank you so very much Jonathan!  
We are very pleased with how well it turned out ~ what a gift of love.

I enjoy seeing the boys' hockey gear drying on the rack in the great outdoors.
It's been such a blessing to have hockey in our lives for all these years.
When the boys were little, I didn't like the idea of them playing hockey.
However, I now see that it's been a blessing, and I am thankful.

Our street is street-hockey-friendly.
As the streets all around us have become busier, 
ours has remained very much the same as it always has been.
It's another gift.

Emma was sick last week ~ it was a precious thing to see her tucked in on the couch.
It's even more precious that she is almost all better now.  
God is always so Good.  No matter what.

Still in her housecoat, she blew some bubbles on the back deck.
Thankful that she is still little girl enough to enjoy these sorts of things!
The laughter we shared as the bubbles blew away is a memory to cherish.

Isn't the bubble in this photo a powerful visual 
of how fleeting these moments really are?

May the Lord help us to enter into the moments He gives.
All the moments string together to make a life.
By God's grace, and in His strength, may we live them all for Him.

He alone is worthy of all our praise.
May we be found praising Him with our lives.
With all our hearts.  For all eternity.

Many Blessings,
Camille

Caught Between

Life is full.  It doesn't wait for us to catch up.

Time marches on.  And, we are caught between two worlds.

The here and now and the eternal.

It's a strange place to be.  It's a normal place to be.

The other evening, Howie and I were at a meeting.

We met some people there for the first time.

Of course, the number of children we have came up.

The simple answer?  Four.  We still have four children.

Three boys and a girl.

One just happens to be in Heaven.

What is Heaven like?

I'm caught between two worlds ~ here and there.
We think and talk and read more about Heaven

than we ever have before.

In the past, it was a distant faraway place that 

was in our future.  We were happy about it ~ absolutely.

However, it didn't occupy many of our thoughts.

I was happily caught up with the things of now.

Now, it's more difficult to navigate the now.

But, these are the things that shape us and fit us for eternity.

It's in these things that we learn and grow and are stretched.

Most of all, we learn more of our Great God.

These days, we remember Austin and speak of him freely.

We cry easily and laugh easily ~ it's all part of the process.

This journey is far from over.  And, that's okay.

We don't really want it to end.  We don't want to forget.

The children are diligently doing school and I am trying to catch up.

Part of me doesn't want to catch up.  But, it's the right thing to do.

So, I go through the day ~ step by step.

The children are a step ahead.  And, it is good.

The boys are quite independent in their studies.

They rarely need help any more.

And, when they do require assistance, they tend to go to Howie.

I find myself mostly needed by Emma in the academic things.

Our school life has come full circle.

In the early days of home educating our children, Emma was a tag along.

She was just four and joined in with us in all that were doing.

She sat with us as we read history and explored science.

She came along on the field trips we took.

Emma was included in everything.

She is serious about her studies.

One of her courses is online this year ~

goodness me!  She is growing up, too.

Why can't we just bottle them up and keep them small

for a little while longer?  It's not possible.  

But, wouldn't it be good to slow things down just a bit?

So, these days are full.  They are colour-full.

And, that's how life is, wouldn't you agree?

We need the black and grey colours in our lives
just as much as we need the bright ones. 
It's how it is.  And, it is good.

So, yes.  We have four children.

Austin still lives.  Just not here.

We seek to live these days as the Lord gives them.
Entering in to each moment and enjoying the gift of now.

By His grace and for His glory.  For now and for eternity.

Because nothing else really matters.

With Love,
Camille

Forever Altered

The new me is here to stay.

The new me is living without part of the old me.

Part of me died when Austin did.

I will never again be who I was before Austin

went Home to Heaven.  Never again.

I'm forever altered.

It's not a bad thing, though.
This new me is more weaned from this world.
My eternal perspective has been sharpened.
I long for Heaven more.  I love the Lord more.

I'm dead to me more.

Austin is not the same, either.
He is perfect and free from his body of death.
One day, I will be too.  One day.

Until then, I must live and follow and serve.
I must put aside the things that weigh me down.
I must abandon all my hopes and dreams to my Saviour.
His ways.  His purposes.  His plans.

All for Him.  Surrendered.
By His grace.  For His glory.  Alone.

With Love,
Camille

**Photo courtesy of our friend Rick ~
Thank you so very much!  

Year Eight Begins

Year eight begins ~ how time has flown!

We began our home education journey when the boys

were beginning grades six, four, and two.

Emma was four years old at the time.

It felt as though I had been thrown into the deep end.

Sometimes it still does.  :)
But, I am so thankful that we have been called
to this path ~ SO thankful!

After morning devotions and breakfast,

we went on our beach walk.

It's good to get back into these routines of life.

They do, however, produce bittersweet memories of days gone by.

It's a path we must tread.  The Lord is Faithful.

He is with us each moment of each day.

His ways are perfect and He lead us so gently along.

How precious it is to belong to Him!

The day began with rain.

We got soaked, so the clothes required drying time.

I *love* my mud room!

Calvin got Emma set up with some things she

needed online for school.

It warmed my heart to see and hear

them interacting at the kitchen table.

Fraser was so happy to crack open the computer

and begin his studies this year ~ 

doesn't he look excited about it all?  

(He really is excited...I'm not joking).

I've mentioned before how much I *love* these books ~

It's a blessing to have access to such wonderful resources!

Who can complain when roses are still in bloom and

making their way indoors?  So fragrant and lovely.
These blooms are from our hybrid tea rose tree ~ 
a gift from our neighbours in memory of Austin...
wasn't that just the sweetest thing to do?

See Emma in the background of this photo?  :)

At this moment, the children are out getting the papers

sorted and delivered ~ It's a blessing, too.

When they come indoors, it will nearly be time for dinner,

and then our night-time routine will be underway.

The first day of year eight is coming to a close.

Thankful this day that the Lord's promises

are sure and that He will keep us until the day 

we are taken Home to be with Him.

May we be found to be faithful to follow wherever He may lead.

May each of you find that His loving Hand is upon you as well.

He is Good.  He is Faithful.  His ways are always best.

Many Blessings,
Camille

Comforting Words

Our precious Auntie Mary gave me a lovely little book

on one of her recent visits to Canada.

I put it into my purse thinking I would read 
snippets of it here and there.

It's full of short quotes from letters which 
Samuel Rutherford wrote nearly 400 years ago.

Recently, I took it out of my purse so I could take it along
on a day trip to visit my friend on the Island.
The trip required over three hours on the ferry ~ lots of time for reading.

I found it to be full of rich nuggets

that ministered to my grieving Mama heart.

Such encouragement, comfort and truth

can be discovered within its pages.  It's precious.

I am sharing a few lines from this little book here today.

May these words be used to encourage your heart as they have mine.

"They are not lost to you that are laid up in Christ's treasury in Heaven.
At the resurrection ye shall meet with them: 
there they are, sent before, but not sent away.
Your Lord loveth you, who is homely to take and give,
borrow and lend."

~ Calvin, Austin and Fraser Circa 2002 ~

"She is not sent away, but only sent before,
like unto a star, which going out of your sight, doth not die and vanish,
but shineth in another hemisphere:
ye see her not, yet she doth shine in another country."

"The child hath but changed a bed in the garden,
and is planted up higher, nearer the sun,
where he shall thrive better than in this out-field moor-ground."

Comforting words?  Absolutely.

Many Blessings,
Camille

**All quotes in this post are taken from Samuel Rutherford's

"The Loveliness of Christ" ~ a rare gem of a book!

Austin's Resurrection Bed

It is such a comforting thing for my Mama heart to consider this ~

Austin's body was sown in corruption, but, it will rise in glory.

Just as the Lord Jesus Christ's body was raised up

in perfection from the tomb, so will Austin's.

From this very spot ~ his resurrection bed.

"But now is Christ risen from the dead,

and become the firstfruits of them that slept."

~ I Corinthians 15:20 ~

"So also is the resurrection of the dead.

It is sown in corruption; it is raised in incorruption:

It is sown in dishonour; it is raised in glory:

it is sown in weakness; it is raised in power:

It is sown a natural body; it is raised a spiritual body.

There is a natural body, and there is a spiritual body."

~ I Corinthians 15:42-44 ~

**Our last name was photo-shopped out of this image**

The grave marker was fashioned from a slab of polished black granite.
We are so pleased with the workmanship of the carving ~ 
the family who did the work are true craftsmen.

We are also thankful for the message it conveys.  
John 6:37 was Austin's favourite verse ~ please click here to read it.

Austin's trust was solely and alone in the finished work of his Saviour.

Our son's body rests in the ground until that glorious day

when all God's people, in the twinkling of an eye,

will be caught up with the Lord Jesus Christ in the air.

"In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye,
at the last trump: for the trumpet shall sound,
and the dead shall be raised incorruptible, 
and we shall be changed."
~ I Corinthians 15:52 ~

What a day that will be!

Rejoicing in the thought of it.

Praising our Great God for the Truth of it.
Life here is temporary.  Life there is permanent.

Many Blessings,

Camille

Fresh Memories ~ A Thankful Post

We are in the midst of the everyday and the routine

and the sometimes-not-so-ordinary things that make up our lives.

Nothing new, really.  However, it is.  

We are making fresh memories together.
Memories are always being made ~ it's the nature of life.

These are the moments that we will cherish in years to come.
That's how it is, isn't it?  

We look back on precious days and events and ordinary

things that reside in photos and in our memories.
They are held in highest esteem.  

Interesting how that works, don't you think?

We long for long ago.

Why do we do that?  Sometimes it robs us of now.
It can keep us from really living this day.  In this moment.
Do we take notice and stop to consider
that these things ought to be treasured up now?

I'm storing up these memories.  These treasures.
I am seeking to live in the moment as the memories are made.

Cherishing and enjoying and entering into every little detail.

May the Lord give grace to hold everything with a loose hand

all the while praising Him for the gifts He gives.

They are all from Him.  They all belong to Him.

He may claim them back at any time.
We are not entitled to any of them.
Yet, He graciously gives and we live because of Him.

My list today is made up of the random things that have been
such lovely blessings in recent weeks.
The here and now is precious.  We are not guaranteed tomorrow.
This ought not to make us tremble.  If we are the Lord's we have nothing to fear.
It ought, however, to make us thankful ~ for every little thing.  
Thankful for every gift no matter how small or insignificant.

Everything is a gift.  Directly from His hand.

Our niece and her husband have a little teeny tiny doggy ~
Her name is Charley, and we were blessed to have her stay with us.
Isn't she just the absolute cutest thing you ever saw?
(Emma is allergic to dogs ~ this was a trial run to see if she
might tolerate one this small.  Apparently she doesn't.  Isn't that sad?)

  

The boys were blessed to be able to take two separate camping trips ~
The first was in the mountains, and included lots of hiking.
The other was to a little local island, and involved a ferry and bikes.

The first trip found our two boys out in the bush
with two boys from our friends' family.
The photos from that trip will likely be featured in future posts ~
God's creation is absolutely stunning.

I am thankful to have a husband who tells me that
we must let the boys do these things ~ it's a rite of passage into manhood.
They were safe and went with responsible young men.
It certainly is a blessing to see them developing these kinds of friendships.

The second trip was to Mayne Island and involved Betsy for transportation.
There were six boys on that trek.  The boys were taken to the ferry
where they loaded up their gear on their backs and bikes,
and journeyed over to the island.
It was an adventure, for sure!

I take no responsibility whatsoever for the food choices they made ~ LOL.

I am thankful that they all stayed safe and enjoyed their time away together.

God is Good to provide such wonderful friends for our boys ~ we are thankful.

The photo below shows the young men as they ventured out ~

Calvin and Fraser are together on the far right.

Emma missed her brothers.
She planned and shopped and decorated their room
to welcome them home from their first trip away.

See how she decorated the bed?
Confession ~ it was done a little too early...
we ate the chocolate bars and I had to replace them ~ LOL!  

I am thankful for sibling friendships ~
Austin's absence from the photo below is painful to my Mama heart.
However, I am thankful that he is where we will one day be.
And, again, God is Good.  Always.

A lovely friend sent me this praying angel ~

wasn't that just the sweetest thing to do?

It's a reminder to my heart that God's people care 

and that we ought always to lift one another up in prayer.

Another sweet friend sent these home-made journals ~
One for me and one for Emma.
We are so thankful for the love shown to us in these
beautiful ways ~ God is so Good!

I'm thankful that my Emma desires to learn
the finer arts of the home ~ she is learning to knit.
This is her first attempt at it.
I thought I would start her out small with a dishcloth...

...but, it grew and grew and grew!
Can you believe that I only cast on 45 stitches?
What happened??!!
We're not sure what this will become...
but, we will figure something out.  :)

I am thankful for a special time out with Emma's Grandma and my Mum-in-Love.

We were able to go to a tea room and enjoy...

...Afternoon Tea!  Isn't this just the prettiest tray of goodies?

It was a real treat.

God's Goodness to us comes in these and a myriad of other ways.

We are thankful for His Loving Hand upon us.

He is gracious and kind and does all things well.

In the midst of sorrow, there is joy.

In what ways have you been blessed this Summer?

Feel free to share in the comments section of this post ~

I'd love to hear what's been a blessing to your heart.

With Love,
Camille